>> Wednesday, May 26, 2010
I'm learning slowly that it is not about being up front or receiving applause or gain (not that it ever shoulda been before). It's not about how well I rehearse lines, and it's definitely not about being in character.
It's about being small, getting out of the way and letting Him speak through me. It's about believing Him faithful. It's about wearing Jesus. It's about sharing the story He's given me, one full of comedy, tragedy, baggage and dirty laundry, yet all the while covered by and filled with hope, faith, love and Truth...Life with a capital "L."
"...putting on faith and love as a breastplate,
and the hope of salvation as a helmet."
1st Thessalonians 5:8
all for His purpose:
"...to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes,
the oil of gladness instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the LORD for the display of His splendor."
The ladies at North Park Baptist Church in Sherman, Texas, allowed God to do this work as they welcomed my prayer partner Margie and me, fed us the yummiest food I've had in years, and made us feel completely at home Monday night. Another reason I felt so at home was because the church and people reminded me so much of the church I grew up in. As I spoke, I saw hunger for the Word of God in their eyes, as well affirmation of His message. I even heard a few "Amens." They overwhelmed me with a generous love offering after I spoke as well. I'm so thankful to their coordinator, Janice, inviting me and taking a chance on this writer/performer turned newbie speaker. I had a blast and learned so much in the process.
These precious mothers and daughters had no idea that the few weeks before the event, I was coming apart at the seams. Little did I know, He was preparing me to be able to speak authentically about the message He'd been weaving together thread by thread for many weeks preceding. The Lord knew I needed to go there stripped of my own capability, confidence and resources, and clothed with His presence alone instead.
So I did. And honestly, I have no idea what He did in others, but I know for sure, He did some major work in me. He'd been teaching me for years as a performer to become smaller, and He's carrying on that same pattern no matter what role I'm in...He is good.
"In His great power, God becomes like clothing to me;
He binds me like the neck of my garment."
"I delight greatly in the LORD; my soul rejoices in my God.
For He has clothed me with garments of salvation
and arrayed me with a robe of righteousness..."
Thank You, Papa, for making me small, and giving me the will and freedom to wear You big 'n tall--at this event, the next one (if you will it), and every moment in-between.